Couldn’t agree more
That doesn’t mean it’s easy to NOT let that trauma turn me into a bitter monster. In fact for a time during the thick of it, I was. Which was also the time when I was struggling BAD with addiction (7 years sober now, it’s the longest I’ve ever been sober). It’s a stretch of time where I deeply regret the person I was.
I’d say the biggest thing that helps me win and be a better person is framing who I am now in a specific way in my mind. If I let all that trauma turn me into a bitter monster, than that means that the monsters that defined the first 24 years of my life continue to have power over me. So basically I go “Fuck you! You won’t turn me into a fucking monster! I’m going be the kind of person none of y’all ever were to me! I’m gonna be kind! I’m gonna be helpful! I’m gonna be the kind of person people are happy and PROUD to know! I’m gonna leave a POSITIVE impact on the lives of people I interact with!”
My sister has the same outlook as me, which brings me joy. She also had awful trauma continue into her 20s.
My brother, not so much though. At least my niece and nephew have my sister and I to interact with often (mostly my sister, my brother doesn’t talk to me very often for reasons I’m not gonna go into) so they’re becoming the kind of people that we’d love for them to be. Being the candle in the dark for them gives them a guiding light so that they have some good to look to.
Those 7 years weren’t easy but they were so worth it
My sleep is better, I’m saving so much money (well… in theory lol), and my CPTSD is easier to deal with