I don’t enjoy anything by the Coen Brothers. Just… doesn’t click with me. I’m sure it’s great art but it’s lost on me.

Your GoT is my Titanic. Still haven’t seen it.

I figure as much, too. I never buy wine for myself; I only drink it at potlucks, which I seem to have a lot of in my life. (And I’m rarely a host so I shouldn’t have much if I’m driving away soon after, anyway.) So I’ve just kinda stopped. That’s okay! I recently learned how to make clarified milk punch, so I’ll drink that instead when I want something alcoholic.

I know this is a shitpost but I’ve noticed something lately and I just want to share it somewhere. I’m a middle-aged white woman for context, and I’m not much of a drinker in the first place but also lately I’ve gotten headaches from wine so I’m not into it. Meanwhile, the ladies I know who do like wine? Like they really like wine. Anytime there is an opportunity for wine, they’re excited. And they find ways to include wine in occasions it normally would not be available. It’s such a fucking stereotype and yet, and yet, good god do they live up to it!

Yes! Valentine’s Day is an equal opportunity bad time for all. Makes single people feel bad and exploits coupled (or poly) people with jacked up prices for flowers and subpar restaurant food that you have to book a month in advance.

I cancel posting comments all the time. I write out this whole thing and then when I get to the end of it, I realize I don’t actually want engagement. Sometimes the internet can be a bit hostile and I’m not always in the right state of mind to want to invite it into my life that day.

Hmm, honestly because I learned so much of this as a kid, it’s hard to pinpoint it. A lot of it is probably instinct solidified by repetition. Yes, I absolutely can identify the root of the chord without actively thinking about the intervals, and since inversions were drilled into me during piano lessons and I had to demonstrate them on exams, I didn’t just hear them; I did them. I’m a big believer in learning by doing, and boy did I do a lot of them. So … yeah, it’s probably just a lot of time and a whole lot of exposure.

Same with intervals. Lots of people use tricks, like knowing the beginnings of certain songs are a specific interval (“Here comes the bride” is a fourth, etc.) but I haven’t had to use those tricks for a long, long time. I sure did teach them to undergrads when I was in grad school, though.

For what it’s worth, solfège is essentially learning the scale degrees and using them to hear things. I definitely hear scale degrees and I don’t think that’s a “wrong” way to go about it, either. Far from it! Whatever works for you is great, and don’t let anyone tell you differently.

I’m particularly fond of rain without wind. Storms are okay but they have some inherent danger of falling tree branches or something. But just steady rain coming straight down? Glorious

Haha you’re not gonna like it! It’s intervals 🤣

The way different chords are made up is essentially stacking different intervals (usually 3rds but not always) on top of each other. But there are different types of thirds: major and minor. (Also diminished and augmented, but those sound like other intervals so im gonna ignore those for now.) A major triad is a major third on the bottom and a minor third stacked on top. A minor third is the opposite. Being able to recognize the tonal quality of a major third vs a minor third is key for my ability to recognize chords. Maybe others have some alternative suggestions. Also, the more you do it, the more natural it becomes. I was inundated with this stuff at an early age when my brain was a sponge.

Give yourself some credit! You should also take what I said with a grain of salt: not only do I seem to have a naturally excellent ear (whereas rhythm and sight reading were where I struggled), but I also went on to major in music theory and had a very, uh, aggressive theory teacher in college who made us sight-sing on solfège for exams, even atonal passages (as in, we had to choose something to be DO and stick with it). It means I learned how to hear intervals in my head, so if I can figure out what the interval is on the page, theoretically I can sing it. (It does get way harder if there is funny stuff going on in other parts!)

In my chorus, I’d say the vast majority of our singers learn by listening to a part track made by their section leaders. Which is essentially singing the same note as the person next to them.

I grew up as a pianist but joined choir in college and stuck with it. One thing that is really hard as a singer is knowing exactly what note to sing. On an instrument, you put your fingers in the right place and play, and you get a note (tuning aside—that’s a whole other issue). Whereas with the voice, you have to know what that note sounds like before you can sing it. For easy music, that’s fine, but my chorus sings a lot of new music, some of which has funky scales or is just straight up atonal. My musicianship has had to level up, and I’m a way better musician and sight reader because of it.

I feel this so hard. My husband “wants to cook more” but doesn’t and I can’t help but feel that what he really wants is for me to do it. (He swears this is not the case! He doesn’t like planning.) But I don’t enjoy cooking at all, plus I have meetings almost every evening. When we do cook, I will say I enjoy the food more. Otherwise I eat because I have to, but nothing sounds good anymore.

Since you helped the other guy, I wonder if you can help me with a different but related inability? I can whistle terrifically, but I’ve never been able to do the really loud one that some people use their fingers to do. My dad can do a killer finger whistle and I’ve always wanted to be able to do it, but alas, no amount of trying or YouTube video promises have made it possible for me.

This is the truth. I’m married to a software engineer, and let me tell you, some of his holiday parties were eye-opening for a lowly arts administrator like me. They’re all totally out of touch with how normal people live. Especially if both income earners in a household work in tech.

She’s been disappointing for a while. I too had higher hopes for her at one time.

That sounds like the beginning of a joke. If it is, what happens?