threeonefour

I was younger and drinking with my friends and my gf. There was another girl in my friend group named Melanie that my gf was always nervous about. I suddenly thought of a way to put her mind at ease. I turned to her and said “I’ve always thought Melanie was ugly”. That’s when I realized it was Melanie sitting next to me.

^ When your grandma says something progressive yet offensive

Years ago I saw a picture of yuri that said “Debian is the distro for lesbians” and that sold me on it.

My current company makes it real easy. All their simulated phishing addresses use the fictitious TLD of “.corn” so I just setup an email rule to filter them.

Speed?

Most couples think they’re Jim and Pam, but my ex-wife and I always laughed about how much we were like Michael and Jan. It wasn’t as funny when we started arguing in front of dinner guests in real life though.

My health class was taught by our gym teacher and she was terrible at it. Some points I remembered being taught:

• Hypertension is when the hamstrings of your legs shrink because you don’t stretch every morning. Hypertension can kill you, so make sure you stretch.
• All drugs make you hallucinate. Every single one of them. Usually dragons. People die on drugs because they’re trying to get away from the dragons and jump off buildings or run into traffic.
• Babies have super suction power which they use to breastfeed. An adult cannot get milk from a breast because they can’t suck hard enough.

I learned these were wrong after starting secondary school where biology was taught by someone who studied biology. Except for the breastfeeding thing. That one was through personal research.

Achtually! Silicon is the 14th element on the periodic table. Sand is (mostly) Silicon Dioxide, SiO2.

There’s even a scene in the Yakuza games where some characters go to a fancy restaurant and the menus are all in kanji. One of them admits he can’t read the menu and the rest of them say they’re having a hard time too. The owner then says it’s common and that maybe he should update the menus to include kana to get with the times.

I figured this must be at least a somewhat common experience if the devs decided to include a scene like that.